Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – May 21, 2004

Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – May 21, 2004

Pause For Thought

Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – May 21, 2004 – Howard’s doctor arrived this morning for a consultation. He had a shiny tool box with him and a big bag of spare parts. Howard didn’t show much emotion but I was immediately alarmed. I was expecting Howard’s sick bits to be repaired not replaced. It was difficult to watch as Howard was unscrewed and opened up.

Soon, bits of him were strewn across the floor. There was a discernible lack of dignity about the process. I finally had to retire to my office to call some clients, and ponder things of greater social and political importance, such as Celine Dion’s decision to become a blonde and Paul Martin’s chances of securing a majority government in the upcoming election.

I tried to ignore Howard’s feeble attempts to maintain a consistent walking speed in the room next door. I heard the doctor start and stop him. A drill buzzed momentarily and then stopped. Dr. Richard finally stuck his head through my door and announced that all Howard’s parts had been replaced, but to no avail, his motor was the culprit. He called it a dud, said it was defective.

I’m now wondering if my treadmill – once repaired – should be called “The New Howard”. Will he have as much heart as The Old Howard? Will he have the same zany sense of humour? These are questions for another day. Alas Dr. Richard or some other interloper will have to return, motor in hand , to complete Howard’s metamorphosis.

When I sat back down at my computer and re-read yesterday’s entry, I was struck at my tendency to focus on what I do wrong, instead of lauding my accomplishments. I know many women who have a propensity for doing this, and it’s high time to stop it, to simply cease and desist. So today, I decided to make a list of twenty-five things that I like about myself just as I am (not when I have firm thighs again – but right now – today). These entries aren’t in any order of importance, or lack thereof – just as I thought of them.

I’m a good friend.

I’m financially responsible.

I work hard.

I’m a good confidante and a very discreet person.

I’m aware of my flaws and weaknesses.

I’m creative.

I’m have a good sense of humour and I’m funny.

I have a good eye for detail.

I’m thoughtful (not always) but usually.

I’m kind.

I’m determined.

I understand the concept of ‘forgiveness’ and work at it.

I remember birthdays and other special occasions.

I have a tender heart.

I help others when I can.

I’m self-sufficient & I enjoy my own company.

I’m organized and neat.

I’m competent.

I’m not a pushover – I have recovered from that tendency.

I keep moving forward with my life.

I ‘m sentimental and I like little rituals.

I appreciate and am proud of my heritage.

I know it matters how I behave in the world.

I love animals.

I’m loyal.

Anybody can do this. When you’re finished – I think you’ll be amazed at how good you feel about yourself. Even if you don’t really believe it all right now, keep this list close by and refer to it often. I’ve printed mine on yellow paper and enclosed it in a plastic sheet protector (naturally) and put it on my side table where I can easily see it. I’m going to leave it there for the rest of the year as inspiration, in my ongoing quest to better understand my life, and how I fit into my place in the world.